You know you shouldn't

I mean I know I sh0uldn't.

How does one describe it when one doesn't understand it? How does one understand when one cannot explain it? Why do things happen as they do? Why do people still go on their way doing things that they know will only lead on to inevitable results that they know they will not be able to take very well?

I had a bad day. I feel crappy tonight. I'm guessing I'm paying for offending people without meaning to, paying for not treasuring friendship, paying for being selfish, paying for gossiping.

I keep coughing at night. It goes away in the day but comes back at night.

My mid terms are crappy too.