We are never alone

I spoke of humanity once before. Of how different we all are on the outside, and yet on the inside people are all the same. Today I am reminded of how this connection binds the human race together. We are on our own, but never ever alone.

Reflecting

From my very first post in this blog:

"This is a year where resolutions are set, but unspoken. Where dreams are chased but results to be known. This is a year of decisions, the year to choose the path at the crossroads. And the year which will shape the future of my life. It’s about taking chances and pushing the boundaries. It’s about seeking new changes and keeping old ones close. It’s about living life to the fullest with every breath that I take, with every beat of my heart. Never ever let things slip away. Seize it. Take it. Make it yours."

Just four months ago, I was so motivated, so full of hope and so alive. And the conclusion is, life has its twists and turns, but if you want it to work out, MAKE IT WORK. Under whatsoever circumstances, find the strength from within and MAKE IT WORK. Nothing is impossible. I just need to hold on to the faith I once held on to so strongly at the most motivated point in my life. I believe in myself. This is a year where unspoken resolutions are set, almost all have been attained. Almost. Dreams are chased, and they will become a reality. Decisions will change the course of my future, but the decisions I will be posed with will be based on fate. An unexpected factor has been thrown in, so it will make things a tad bit more complicated. To seek new changes and keep the old ones is easier said than done. But I will live life to the fullest and appreciate it. Emo as I can get, I always wake up to the world and I realise that life IS beautiful.

Tagged

I was tagged like more than a MONTH ago by orangengwq. Suddenly felt like doing this.

RULES:
1. The rules of the game get posted at the beginning.
2. Each player answers the questions about themselves.
3. At the end of the post the player then tag people and posts their names, then go to their blogs and leave a comment, letting them know they got tagged.***

Starting time: 10:50p.m.
Name: Meiyi
Sisters:1
Brothers: 2
Shoe size: 6 or 7
Height: 5''2
Where do you live: KL
Home sweet home: KK
Favourite drinks: Any tong shui =D
Favourite breakfast: half boiled eggs. Not too hard, not too soft

Have you ever...
Been on a plane: yes
Swam in the ocean: no. I've been in the ocean but I don't think I've ever swam in it lol
Fallen asleep in school: yes
Broken someone's heart: haha how am I supposed to know
Fell off your chair: nope. fell down in all other sorts of situations but not off a chair
Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call: haha my phone is always with me, so the phone sits next to me while I stay up waiting
Saved e-mails: yes, the useless ones

What is your room like: I just cleaned it, so it looks MUCH better than it has been in the past few months
What's right beside you: my computer, water bottle, clock, phone, pendrive, note that says "things to do tonight : micro lab report, moral slides, letter to SAD, biochem report, learn glycolysis" (Only have the first on the list done =( unfortunately. Told you I'm never productive at night! Wasn't exaggerating.)
What is the last thing you ate: an apple bought from jusco

Ever had
Chicken pox: yes, in kindergarten. I am now immune =D
Sore throat: haha can you find someone who hasn't?
Stitches: nope

Do you
Believe in love at first sight: hell no
Like picnics: as long as its out of the scorching hot sun

Who was the last person
You danced with: i think pretib in hong kong haha
Last made you smile: hahahahahaha PERSONAL thoughts =p none of your business
You last yelled at: I don't remember

Best feeling in the world: something that makes me grin like an idiot, and I can't stop because I'm on an absolute high. =D
Do you sleep with stuffed animals: nope. The hostel bed is too small. With my three pillows, there's not much room for stuffed animals.
What's under your bed: guitar, storage box with past semester's notes, 2 suitcases, all my pails and shampoo+ conditioner + shower foam
Who do you really hate: sometimes, myself

RANDOM.
Q: Is there a person who is on your mind right now: yes
Q: Do you want children: maybe
Q: Do you smile often: when I am in a good mood.
Q: Do you like your hand-writing: when I take the initiative to write nicely, yes. If not it looks crappy
Q: Are your toenails painted: yes. They are kind of transparent if you don't look closely but tinted PINK =p
Q: Whose bed other than yours would you rather sleep in: the one at home. I miss my REAL OWN bed
Q: What colour shirt are you wearing: white
Q: What were you doing at 7:00pm yesterday: I think I was sleeping
Q: I can't wait till: I know the answer to my question
Q: When did you cry last: the night I had gastric
Q: Are you a friendly person: lol am I?
Q: Do you have any pets: not at the moment.

Do you sleep with the TV on?
no TV here

What are you doing right now?
doing this survey

Have you ever crawled through a window?
haha probably

Can you handle the truth?
NO. But even if I can't handle it I still want the truth, and nothing but the truth. I can handle it lah. Learning to accept that life is not all glitters and sparkles.

Are you too forgiving?
No

Are you closer to your mother or father?
Closer in different ways to each

Who was the last person you cried in front of?
Hmmm... I'm not sure lah, who has seen me cry lately?

How many people can you say you've really loved?
2

Do you eat healthy?
no. lol I am a health freak's nightmare

Do you still have pictures of you & your ex?
what ex

Have you ever cried because of something someone said to you?
yes

If you're having a bad day, who are you most likely to go to?
my blog. emo post.

Are you loud or quiet most of the time?
loud. When I'm quiet, there is something wrong with me.

Are you confident?
I look like I am. But it's all nonsense.

5 things I was doing 10 years ago..
1- cycling everyday
2- going to primary school
3- loving projectwork
4- finding art as my newfound love
5- starting to become an emo pre-teen. Yes, my teenage angst was premature.

5 things on my to-do list today
1- micro lab report (done!) just need to print tomorrow.
2- letter requesting for proof of completion of diploma (halfway)
3- Read the case study for moral (halfway)
4- Do moral presentation slides (not yet started)
5- sleep early (yeah right)

5 snacks I enjoy
1- dark chocolates
2- almonds
3- pringles
4- jacob's oatmeal biscuits
5- fruits

5 things I would do if I were a billionaire
1- Sponsor someone in their education
2- Travel
3- Give to family
4- Haha throw a party!
5- The cars that match my clothes? :P

5 places I have lived in
1- KK
2- KL
3- president hotel london
4- marco polo hotel hong kong
5- tracey's house

5 jobs I've had
1- student
2- free of charge tuition teacher LOL
3- freelance contributor for stuff@school
4- helped out in selling books at school?
5- competition friend =p

No need to tag, lazy

Swollen feet

Yesterday something bit my foot, somewhere near my small toe. This morning, I woke up with my right foot the size of a baby elephant's and unimaginably red. What insect could have bitten me till this amount of swelling can take place? It looks the way it did when I sprained my ankle several months ago, minus the ankle swelling of course. I can hardly bend my foot, and I FELL down the bloody stairs in the admin block today. And I don't mean trip and almost fell. I mean REALLY falling like how little kids accidentally stumble and fall when they're learning how to walk. =( Imagine my rock-heavy file flying out of my grasp, my hands automatically flinging out to break my fall and my knees slamming into the steps in front of me. Ouch. To make matters worse, I just so happened to be wearing a skirt today. It's so embarrassing. I don't know how that happened, I was walking UP the staircase! Ever heard of falling UP? Luckily no one else saw me but one member of the staff and she didn't laugh. Reminds me of form 4 and 5, where I slipped and fell down the stairs countless times. Gosh, my motor co-ordinations are getting out of whack again. It's a sign of lethargy. Lack of proper sleep. Or, a new word I learnt today: malaise. It's not pronounced ma-lai-ase as the lecturer said. Its me-lez!! Add that word to your vocab, its a French derived word, meaning a general out-of-sorts feeling.

The RM250 cheque made me feel tons better though. I am getting so materialistic. x_X

Lots of stuff to complete before the night is done. I have been eating way too many egg sandwiches for my meals. Just had one for dinner just now. Now gotta get back to work. Have some presentation slides, a lab report, a letter and also a chapter to revise.

Hong Kong Day 4: 17th July 08- Ocean Park and POSERSSSSS mwahahahahaha

Ocean Park day was awesome. Despite the heavy incessant rain (which by the way never stopped throughout the day), and the fact that my camera batteries died halfway through the trip, I had the most awesome time ever. Thanks to the most amazing POSERS mwahahaha yeah that's YOU, you YEA bronze team!! Pretib says I have more photos in his cam than he has of his own. *grins* I bet there's still more, where are they? I want I want I want!!!! =p I know I have LOTS MORE OF THEM PHOTOS, but they're not with me... sob sob sob I want them, ppl!!

And the day started with Zhen Han being the boss =p Someone is NOT wearing the HSBC shirt!

Ee Loo, Me and Andrew in the hotel lobby

In the bus on the way to Ocean Park

First stop: The Giant Panda Habitat


If you look carefully behind slightly towards the top left, you will see the panda sleeping. I know it looks like its dead but it's very much alive, trust me.

Awwww my favourite favourite favourite favourite photo of the whole of this Hong Kong trip!! I love love love love love love love love the soft toy baby pandas. They are awfully photogenic too =D

We were so privileged to be given a talk by the CEO of Ocean Park himself, Mr Tom Mehrmann. I was impressed.

The restaurant we had lunch in was a cable car ride away

In the cable car with Ee Loo and Dom

How do you take a pic with 5 ppl in it, without a cameraman? It takes SKILL. Or in this case, a mirror above =p Love this pic.

Lunch!! Oh, we were so well fed, we were over-fed.

Dessert =D

What what what? Never see people eat b4 ah? *grins*
No, those are not all MY cakes. I just posed with them =p

After lunch we were free to explore Ocean Park. We headed towards the jellyfish aquariums. They were the most magnificent sights, where the interchanging lighting and the softly blending music created a soothing atmosphere. It was so beautiful that I told the rest I want to wake up in the morning with these above me, watching as the jellyfish float along serenely, changing colours and moving in accordance to the soft music in the background. It's so absolutely beautiful, something I couldn't capture on camera. You HAVE to see it for yourself, and all your senses will the captivated by the absolute perfect-ness of it all. It was spectacular.

The wonderful world of jellyfish

Some are big

Some are small

Some are just so brilliantly intricate

Thanks Boey for taking these 2 pics, I love it, its so magical playing with the mirror for effect.

Can you handle TWO Meiyis? =D

The Shark AquariumArhhhh!! Want to FIGHT issit?!

We can BITE just as well as SHARKS can!

Have you ever seen a shark this close?

That was just pretty darn awesome!

Behold the wonders of the undersea world

It's so breathtakingly beautiful. So serenely calm and peaceful. Top view.


Side view through the glass. It was like being transported to a whole new world.

Turtle!

Sting ray

Proof I was THERE

Hence, the posing starts. Presenting... Ronnie... Meiyi... Dominic... Pretib...

Whoaaaaa!!! MONSTERRRRR!!!!

Eric and I

Ronnie, Me and Pretib. Guess who's the center of attention? mwahahaha damn perasan x_X

YOU!!!!

Don't ask me why I am hugging the sea lion

Myriad colours of absolute brilliance captivate my attention. Not to mention they are all so very alive. Makes me think that nature is such an awesome gift, and the life we see around us, more precious than anything else.

Dolphin show! Thats when my camera batteries ran out =( Wanted to take a photo with the dolphins doing their famous flips. Alas! Next, came the sea lions who put up an spectacular show. After which, we noticed some similarities between Boey and sea lions. Thus, Boey had to live with me calling him "Sea Boey" for the rest of the day.

It was raining cats and dogs and yet those brave people wanted to go on a ride similar to the "solero shots" (I don't know what the real name is, my friends call it that) in genting. I however, decide that it would be cool to pose for more photos. Thus the Star Wars Darth Vader and accomplice shot with our ponchos. Ignore the January 1st 2004. Ronnie's camera needs resetting to the correct date. ^_^

Rudely awakened

I just woke up, in spite of resolutions to wake up early this Sunday morning to fulfill my academic obligations. Shit-lah, supposed to study biochem. Been saying that since two freaking weeks ago. Unfortunately, due to unforeseen events in the middle of the night, my day starts at 2 pm today. =( Which is pretty damn annoying because I am always unproductive at the second half of the day, doesn't matter what time I get up.

In the middle of the freaking night at 4+ am I was awaken by agonising spasms in my stomach. Every few seconds my stomach felt like it was convoluting upon itself as gastric juice bites into the empty stomach walls. I have forgotten how painful it was to have gastric, and how un-ignorable the excruciating sensations were. I was so tired because I was after all, in the middle of my otherwise peaceful sleep, but trying to ignore the pain and go back to sleep was like trying to ignore being burnt by fire, only thing the burning is now inside of me, minus the flames. After awhile, I decided that it wasn't going to go away so I was forced to get up, boil some water and make myself a cup of oats. For those of you who have had gastric, you know that eating something will only make the pain so much worse before it gets better. Sure enough, the searing pain increased in magnitude, and it was hurting so badly that it could almost make me cry. I tried lying down in all sorts of ways, sitting down, standing up, tossing and turning and there was no single position where it was comfortable, or where it didn't feel so painful. Many a time, I was on my knees, doubled over with my hands over my head, gritting the pain. Never have I remembered another time when I was so craving for some drugs to take away the pain. I really felt like waking up my roommate to ask if she had some gastric medications but she looked like she was sleeping so peacefully, and I don't think she had any meds anyway. My ex-roommate might have, she always have stores of medications for any ailment possible at her fingertips. I never take drugs unless I really cannot stand it. And last night, it felt like the stomach-wrenching pains would last forever. My hands were cold, my cheeks were flushed, and my face contorted into unimaginable expressions as my the stomach acids kept up their torturous work. It was more than an hour before the pain finally toned down and I could get back to sleep.

It's bloody unfair. I've been trying to eat properly lately, have proper meals at proper times and not skip meals and what do I get? I get FAT and I get killing gastic pains in the middle of the freaking night. Sigh.

Meiyi is high - on 21% oxygen 0.03% carbon dioxide

Highs and lows consume so much energy. They say that when something is on ground state and it gets excited, it will fall back to ground state sooner or later because it is more stable. Thus, theoretically, my instability will spontaneously tone down in due time and I will once again be stable.

And yet they say that everything in this world tends towards a state of disorder. Would that not be conflicted with the first theory? Disorder = not stable. Thus, theory two applied says that I will not spontaneously tone down the instability but spontaneously will be propelled towards further exponential growth of instability. I can just imagine a graph for it.

According to Aristotle, the moral way is the "jalan tengah" which means moderation. Since I do things in extremity, under the moral analysis of personality virtues, I am immoral.

I laugh to myself quite often. Normal observation and deduction leads to a conclusion of insanity.

My post is having so many academic connotations. I think its guilt in my subconscious that's telling me to hit the books.

I am conflicted. I hate politics. No, I'm not talking about our nation's politics, I'm talking about small scale community politics. Politics with the people around us. Politics with cash matters. Politics with name matters. Politics that just get you so freaking sick of it, you just wanna say "it's nothing to do with me," and thus you get branded irresponsible. Not enough? I'm sorry, I'm not the one to judge. I can't be nice all the time, I'm sorry if it makes me look bad. The real world is not a fairytale. I was told years ago, only lately I'm starting to see the truth of it.

Convocation

Today was my diploma convocation from 9 to 11am. Need to get my hands on the photos! I don't even have a single one right now. I shall post them here when I do get them =D

Numb

When I'm tired, my head becomes numb. It doesn't hurt very badly, but it feels quite awful, sort of like a dull pain. Overused, overworked. Class from 8.30am to 5pm with only an hour break for lunch, then came back and do college work, with the only break for dinner. My mind is so tired, it wants to shut down.

I just found out that it was not one, but TWO articles published in stuff@school in The Star yesterday!! Whee!! My nike shoes?? Hmmm

It's immense satisfaction to see my name in print. Syok sendiri-ing to the max.

But my head hurts. I'm going to go rest now.

damn it

I did my lab report in the middle of the freaking night....
and...
and...
and...
and...
i had another ms word window opened.. and i accidentally saved THAT instead of the other and OVERWRITE the bloody file. And I exited it before i realised the mistake.

Now is GONE and I dont know how to get it back

sob sob sob sob sob

CRY

I'm in an awesome mood today

I wasted the whole day in Times Square wandering around. But I am in such an awesomely good mood! =D =D Even though I stared at the Nike shoes for ages, deliberating whether I should buy or should not buy. In the end I did not get a pair, but I so want a pair of Nike shoes. And I saw this shirt that I liked a lot, but this girl saw it first... so... oh well.

I was walking along SAS office to make an inquiry and I passed by a lecturer. She asked how am I and I told her that everything is so tough, her subject is tough and chemistry is even worse. She said not to worry "I believe in you." lol. But it was very nice, and it helps. Really it does.

I am in a good mood though. I was straight after all my documentation and certification and letter writing was done and everything was in order, and the lecturer said mid term's being postponed a week!

Now I'm back in my hostel room and doing my lab report. Interview's on wednesday. I'm nervous because I don't know what to expect. Just go with the flow =) Gonna get back to my work right now.

I am dammmmmmmmmmnnnnnnnnnnnnnn hyper! hehe *jumps jumps jumps*

I should go out more

I'm damn happy today. For no absolute reason. Went out and just got back. Busy week ahead of me, but suddenly I feel so alive.

Sis says I look horribly tired. I know I do.

It feels good to be so swamped. Takes my mind of everything.

Re-do

I just realised something I should have a long time ago. I've been going through things that I wrote a long time ago, up to a few years. Things seem to repeat themselves under different circumstances, with different people, in a different situation, yet still essentially the same.

And I realise...

It's just not worth it.

Writing is therapeutic. Should do more of this. Since I don't know who to talk to I'll just write and write and write for my sanity.

Late nights

I hate late nights. I think too much at these hours. I went downstairs just for some fresh air and I noticed that the lights are on in quite many rooms. I wonder if they haven't gone to bed, or whether they have just woken up.

I am doing my lab reports. Had a shower at 2.30am. It was freaking cold. I've screwed up my sleeping times again. I woke up close to 2pm yesterday, went to sleep at 4pm, woke up at 7.30pm, went down and nothing looked appetizing so took a taxi to wangsa for dinner. Practically the whole day was wasted sleeping. And my level of productiveness at night is practically nil. So I have been here with my biochem manual and my graph paper for 4 hours and I haven't even plotted a graph. I've made a few blog posts, wrote an entry in my proper diary, something I haven't done in ages, and listened to all the freaking emo songs which makes me feel worse. I notice ANOTHER pimple. Sigh.

I will go back to my work now.

Hong Kong Day 3

The day started with browsing around Esprit store with Andrew and Eric. They didn't allow us to take photos inside, so this was the best we could do. After that we went souvenir shopping and met up with Ee Loo for lunch. We had to go back to the hotel in time for the coach to HSBC building for the Young Entrepreneur's Awards Regional Finals.

We had a choice as to whether we wanted to follow the Gold teams in the coach to the venue, or find our own transport there later. To make things easier and to save money, we decided to take the bus with them. Unfortunately, there were more people than there were seats, so we were standing in the bus, when they announced "Malaysia Silver and Bronze teams come down from the bus". Apparently it was against Hong Kong's traffic rules to have anyone standing on the bus. Of all the teams from the different countries, poor us. We alighted from the bus, and tried to look sad for this shot. Unfortunately, Andrew made a comment and Ronnie and I couldn't contain our laughter. Thus, this shot is made up of half of us laughing, have of us looking sad and unwanted.

We had no choice but to take two cabs. They were so freaking expensive, but thank goodness, covered by HSBC "emergency money". Pretib, Ronnie and Boey took one cab, where else Andrew, Eric and I took another. The other guys' cab costs more than us even though it was from the exact same spot to the exact same place.

Boey, Pretib, Ronnie, Me, Eric

We were there early, so was brought on a tour around HSBC.

Then we went to the competition venue to support our Malaysian Gold team for the Regional Finals. They were the first team up. This year, the best of the best and also the best presentation awards went to Thailand. Congrats Ja. Benz and Chris!

Group photo with all the other teams from the other countries. The winning team is in front with those really awesome white dresses.


After the competition was the Cocktail reception. We took some photos, and this would probably be my favourite =)

After eating, as typical Malaysians, we went to have dinner. (food again!)


The food is so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so GOOOOODDDD MMMMmmmmm

Then Andrew brought us to Lam Kuai Fong just to look around. It's THE pub/bar/club district of Hong Kong with rows and rows of all sorts of pubs and clubs. We didn't go in any that day though, because I had to go back and meet the rest of them at the lobby at 11pm.

Ee Loo saw a SaSa store, and as usual goes crazy x_x hehe After that, we took a ferry back to Tsim Tsa Tsui for the first time. Today I managed to get a really pretty shot of Hong Kong.

The jetty (if it's even called that, I don't think it is)

The best shot of Hong Kong in my entire collection of 600+ photos

Eric, Me and Ee Loo in the ferry. Andrew helped us take this one.

I went back in time to take a shower before heading out again. The weather was horrible. It was raining cats and dogs. It was a good thing I brought my umbrella along, but no one else did, and we were all wet wet wet. We got ourselves to a bar somewhere (I don't know where) and just settled down at a pub for some drinks. I didn't take much photos though, which was a pity. Most of them were Thais, so they were speaking in fluent Thai, and I couldn't understand and all I could say was "sawatdeeka!!" I did learn how to say I love you in Thai though. =p Chan Rak Kun. A few from the Philipines' teams were also there.

Ja Benz and I

When we got back to the hotel, we were in one of the rooms playing I never ever. Unfortunately, even though we tried to be as quiet as possible, the walls were too thin and people complained =( We then decided to end the day and went back to sleep. That was the end of day 3 in Hong Kong.